My day started off as usual. 7 am wake up, breakfast, packed a lunch,
labeled everything of Lincoln's, double checked everything including bus
pick up time and location. He had a bath, bushed his teeth and combed
his hair. Then it was time. I brought Lincoln to the bus stop where he
would get on the bus with a group of older kids. 2 other moms waited
with their kids who were much older than Lincoln. One of the older
children was asked by their mother to be Lincolns bus buddy on his first
day - in which she rolled her eyes and did a gasp of annoyance - but
agreed. While waiting for the bus, the other kids casually threw the
"R" word around like it was part of their regular vocabulary.
This.Hurt.Alot. Not only was I sending Lincoln on the bus for his first
day at school EVER, but I was sending him on the bus with kids who
threw his 'medical' term around like it was nothing. I was sending him
on the bus with someone who didn't really want to be his bus buddy. BUT,
he hopped on the bus, and didn't look back. I dashed home and jumped
in my car... yes, I am one of those moms - I followed the bus....
watched Lincoln get off, and saw the special ed coordinator see Linc,
take his hand and guide him out of my 'being a creeper in discuise'
site. I assured myself he would be fine - to my knowledge, yes, he was
being taken care of.... And then there were waterworks. My entire day
was filled with emotions. But that's normal - right?? 
Trying to pass time... Parker and I met a friend, and went out for
breakfast. We went to the grocery store. We did puzzles, played games,
read books and did anything to keep both of us busy and off of each
others nerves. tick tock . WAHOO its 3:10 !! I leave to go pick
Lincoln up. He could have taken the bus home, but I need to build a
good relationship with his teachers, and for my own peace of mind, need
to know details of his day - which I was welcomed to do. I was a little
late after being un successful finding parking, didn't have a chance to talk to his teacher, and ended up meeting
Lincoln by his bus. He greets me with a huge smile.
I pick him up, hug him and snuggle his face off... and I feel that
his pants are wet, and he smells like pee.... 'insert water works here'
...again. Lincoln IS potty trained. He DOES know when he has to go to
the toilet. But, he also DOES have the odd accident... so I take a
breath, and let it slide. Busy day for the little guy. I can
understand. We get home, and he didn't stop blabbing - talking way too
fast we couldn't understand what he was saying - now that... is obvious
excitement!!! I un packed his backpack, take out the notes and lunch
pail - only to find it is still full of all the food I packed him. We
had been practicing eating sandwiches, and other packable lunch items
like strawberries, goldfish, and pepperettes. All he ate was the
pepperette. He didn't seem phased by it, but grabbed the goldfish out of
it when we got home. Packing Lincolns lunch was something I had been
pondering over for quite some time. Anyone who knows Linc, knows he
doesn't just eat EVERYTHING. He doesn't do cookies or granola bars, he
doesn't do raw veggies or apples, he doesn't like juice boxes and he is
picky on the flavour of goldfish on a usual day. This worried me. BUT -
I got over it. Hes a hefty kid... a little lack of lunch wont kill
him. 
All in all, he seemed to have thoroughly enjoyed his day!! So - WHY was it so hard for me?? I couldn't talk to anybody about Lincolns first day without crying!! I was an emotional wreck. From the R word getting tossed around, to the annoyance of someone having to be Lincoln's bus buddy, to his wet pants and a full lunch pail. That was why. But then I realized, with every struggle is a learning curve. I prayed all night, and God reassured me that I need to take a stand! I need to show the world WHO Lincoln is. I need to voice myself to others that using the "R" word is NOT ok. That just because Lincoln's communication skills are not clearly understood by everyone yet - doesn't mean he should be the target of other kids. He will get there. I even contemplated homeschooling, but was reminded that Lincoln is too much of a 'people person' to take the daily interactions away from him. And I get that. He has strived so much already in his life - and it has hardly even begun. People who have gotten to know him have changed, because of him. Because he is who he is, and because people are accepting and loving and caring and mean well.
I have learned not to dwell on things. It will only tear me apart in the long run. I can't feel sorry for myself. Lincoln needs me. He needs me to be the strongest me I can be - and I'm working on that. He needs me to communicate with his teachers because - I - (for now) am his voice. This morning I dropped him off. I talked to his teacher(s), explained he had an accident, and didn't eat his lunch. Last night I got all upset about everything without putting myself into Lincolns shoes. Its a change... he wont jump right into what everyone else is doing until it becomes a routine. He wont get up to go potty and he might not eat his lunch right away. AND his teachers don't know him yet. Give it time... breathe... and pray. Let Lincoln show the world who he is. Let him shine, and watch others fall in love with his loving and caring lifestyle. Give him an extra hug everyday, and be glad that that is the end of my first day blues.
If there is anything I want you to take away from reading this - its to educate your own children. Not everyone is the same. Being different is AWESOME, and teach them to accept people that are different - for who they are.... And, that its not ok to use the R word. If you haven't already removed it from your vocabulary, please do.
Lincoln thanks you :)
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